I am so tired. Tired on so many levels – physically, emotionally, spiritually, professionally. I am tired of drama. Tired of stress. Tired of meetings. Tired of being polite to everyone. Tired of be sensitive and understanding and pacifying. Tired of not being able to spend time with my family like I want. Tired of the fact that my time is not my own, but committed to everyone else’s project. What to do? What do I give up?
This seems to be a re-occurring theme in my life. I take on a lot. I fill up my schedule and then find that the combination of all of my commitments with their various meetings, events, and practices leaves me stretched very thin. It wasn’t a huge problem when I was a single college student. Now that I am a married business owner with two kids, it’s a problem. In the past, I would run, run, run, crash and then get up and do it again. I allowed my self recovery time as my schedule was my own. Now – mornings come early no matter how much you did yesterday with a business to run and kids to corral.
Time is precious. I don’t think I quite understood how precious it was until I became a wife and a mother. Your time is no longer own. Everything you do and every dollar you spend has to be accounted for with your partner. Not in a bad way. More of the full disclosure kind of way. Whatever your priorities prior to marriage, they change the moment you say ‘I do.’ Still doesn’t quite answer the question – what to do, what to do – does it?